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Mc Spaniel Expected to Bring Record Sales for International Fast Food Chain

"We've been taught a thing or two by the Koreans" said spokesperson Jimmy Schmitts, "There is a large area of delicious edibles out there which have been entirely overlooked"



Corporate Investigations Continue

Several corporate officers have been brought in for questioning, following rumors they had been driving Camaros.

"These accusations could lead to serious consequences for the corporate leaders." says investigator Will Hoffman, "Though production of the Camaro only recently ceased, driving them has been outlawed since adoption of the White Trash Bill in October, 1987"




Breaking News: Nelly Album Sales Skyrocket - Since Putting Tape On Face



Breaking News: Recent information gently collected from captured Al Qaeda members on truth serum indicates Bin Laden has been traveling under the guise of "Sheik Yerbouti" for several months now.


Hollywood Residents Plan Next Month's P.R. and Tax Incentive Meeting

Planning for next month's meeting is seeing it's challenges as board members are still in deliberation over what to call next month's event.

At the top of the list of potential names for the event are: "For The Children", "For Those with Breast Cancer" and "For Those Less Fortunate, Everyone"

Other topics of debate include color and placement of ribbons, as well as who is to cater the event.



This Just In: Chevy truck owner spends day coming up with acronyms for F.O.R.D.


Second Rapper in history breaks 30 second barrier of not talking about himself.

This was reportedly a result of choking on a steak at Ted's of Beverly Hills.  Though we cannot confirm the rapper's identity, sources indicate it may have been Master P.