Weapons of Ass Destruction Found In Iraq

A recent special forces raid in Baghdad led to the discovery of a "secret pleasure room", formerly belonging to Saddam Hussein.

Though evidence suggests the former Iraqi regime had destroyed a majority of the secret room's contents - several double-dongs were recovered.  Some other items included graduating diameter love beads, incriminating documents and the entire Ass Man video series.

This comes as a welcome relief to the Bush administration, who has fallen victim to stanch criticisms after failing to come up with a smoking gun in post-war Iraq. 

"The Whitehouse can now celebrate" says Lt. James Gustavson, in reference to recovered documents - pointing to former mistresses of Saddam, each of which specialized in smoking gun.